The Test has Been Given!

Today was the day of the infamous ALCPT. The students need to get a 70 in order to get into Aviation training and an 80 to move on to Undergraduate Pilot Training (UPT).  As this is everyone's goal, even those who were very week in English thought they should get these scores; when they didn't, they were very upset. Fortunately we were able to finally convince them that, for the most part, the scores were in the normal range and that the little up and down movements are normal. There were a couple that I would question as to whether they should actually be here or not, but that is not my call.

As today was Thursday, it was also a half teaching day. That is why we choose to do testing on this day because we don't have to worry about cancelling classes and such. After the tests were done and corrected, we all decided to go and celebrate the fact that 9 students will be graduating on to UPT!  We went to the Italian compound for pizza. It is always and adventure going to the Italian compound as we have to sign in, sign out, unload the weapons, and then watch as they sell alcohol to Italians only... a very interesting look comes into the eyes of the Brits and some of the Americans when they see the beer they long for but are not allowed to have. Such suffering over a drink.

Tomorrow is Juma (Friday). This is my one full day off. I am not yet sure what I am going to do with it, but I plan on relaxing as much as possible. I may even start running with the group as I really need to get into and stay in shape! I am by no means overweight, but I am not fit either. Perhaps this is a good chance to do that. I guess we shall see what happens.

Results and more

The discussion with my coworker went fairly well; not quite as I had rehearsed, but when does that ever happen? There were agreements that were made, though I am not sure they are really being met, though I think that is just part of the fun. I have never understood how so much drama gets going in places, but it seems I have set myself smack dab in the middle of it here! Just one more part of becoming part of the real world yet again (though some may say that I am still living in some fantasy world with little basis in reality).

I am learning various words and phrases in 3 different languages: Dari, Pushtu, and Uzbek! It is a swarm of vocabulary that keeps coming at me, and it is amazing how many coincidental words there are! It is very humorous to learn these great words and to maybe one of these days form a sentence or two. I really need to focus on studying some Dari though. I want to be able to have a good grasp of it when I return to the US; perhaps I will be able to study it further then.

I keep seeing jobs posted that I would love to get, but either I can 't apply for them, or they are requiring people to be there before I will have the ability to be there. I guess this is another time that I just have to be patient and hope that things work out for the best. I am here until I leave, and I am not even sure when that is now. I guess I will have to discover that soon enough. I am not sure if they are going to give me the paperwork to stay for the full year that I am supposed to stay here for, but I will definitely let everyone know when I find out. This will affect when and where I go on R&R, so I really would like to find out soon!

That is all that is happening at the moment. Here is to hoping that it keeps going in that direction!

Long overdue

It seems that my mind has been so overworked that I have been neglecting the very thing that could relieve the frustrations of this life I am living. I find that on Thursday afternoons and Fridays I am worn out from all the contact with people that I need to find time for myself, yet it is very difficult to do that here. Part of it is that there is really no place to go outside of my room that other people aren't located, and part of it is that I crave human contact! The problem comes with the type of contact that I need. I need contact that is stimulating but not with me as the teacher. I have to get out of that role, and that is very difficult when you live with your students and everyone else is busy seeing you in that role as well!

 

With that said, I did manage to get a little reprieve when I agreed to do a grammar lesson for two of our female students. I explained some of the grammar they were having diffiuclties with and then it turned into a discussion about lotion, cosmetics, and oily vs. dry skin. It felt good being able to just talk and not have to worry about people telling me that these are things that men are not supposed to talk about. Oh, how we limit the freedom of those around us and ourselves with stereotypes and artificial boxes!

 

The regular site lead came back this past Thursday, and it was such a great thing! We have been able to get classes settled where they need to be, and I have a lot less to worry about now. I am still skipping lunches and such, but that is pretty normal for me. I do have a problem with one of my coworkers though. I am hoping to be able to talk to her about it soon, though. I told her this morning that I needed to talk with her about it, so I should be able to either right after lunch or early this afternoon. Hopefully it isn't too late by then. It is a huge problem that has been brewing for quite some time. I guess that if I would have just confronted her in the first place it wouldn't have been this large, but that is me: always wishing to avoid confrontation when possible (all this while still reserving the right to argue just for the sake of arguing of course).

 

All in all, I am feeling alright today. I think I had way too much coffee, but that happens sometimes. I don't sleep well, so I need to do something to stay awake while I teach. After that, I can either take a nap or do someting to keep me occupied so that I am tired for the night. It doesn't seem to work, but I do it anyway. Here is to hoping all goes well with the discussion. Until next time, take care!

 

 

Tea with Teachers

Yesterday afternoon I spent 2 hours after class drinking tea. Normally during this time I would be doing reports, reviewing the day, preparing for the following day, or other such useful things; however, this time it seemed more beneficial to drink tea. One may not generally think of tea as being beneficial, but I have since learned its true value, even if it is not the healthy green tea that many talk about these day. How did this all come about in the first place, you may ask; and why do I care? Both of these are very good questions; let me attempt to answer them.

 

After class yesterday, I had to make a teachers' account on the computer that sits between the two classrooms. Eventually these are to become part of the language lab for the students, but we have to wait for the rest of the computers to come for that to happen. In the meantime, since the Afghan contract instructors are unable to bring their own laptops onto base, I have decided that they can get some use out of these computers and use them to plan lessons, prepare other activities, and all the other things they need to do that does not require Internet access (which is unavailable to them). I will have to find someway of transferring this information to another computer that has the ability to print, but that is another problems that will just have to wait.

 

 During this time, I made plans to go and observe my non-intensive class instructor, which I managed to go and do today. I didn't realize where I had to go to do the observation, and I went with just him and myself. This was NOT a smart idea. I had to walk through Afghan National Army territory and into their headquarters. They were supposed to search me but decided not to. It appears that I was supposed to remove my sidearm, but I did not do this. I went upstairs to the Chief of Staff's office which doubled as the classroom. When I was leaving (halfway through the class), a guard was sitting at the end of the hall. He was holding a machine gun and there was what looked to be a 50 caliber, belt-fed machine gun on the floor. It came into my mind that perhaps I shouldn't be in this environment as the lone armed American. At least I had tea just before class started; I will never do it again! I am not sure what I am going to do about observing the other class, though I think that one is in one of the tents. I guess we will have to see what happens tomorrow. It definitely isn't so important that I need to do something that is dangerous; I will just teach!

 

 

Not quite well, but quite well enough

Things are a bit stressful at the moment. Part of it is due to the new increased workload I obtained as the acting site lead. The new contract instructor (CI) joined us just as I came into this position, there have been many changes that were implemented since this time, and I have had to catch up on work that was unable to be addressed previously due to lack of time. I have, fortunately for me, not been teaching during this time so I could devote most of my time to dealing with such issues. Unfortunately, during this time my students have been feeling neglected. They are not happy with the CI as he is not American and teaches very differently than they are used to. He spends too much time on each lesson while all the students wish to do is move on.

 

There have also been issues on the military side as well. We have been going back and forth about various things in an effort to solve many of the problems. For now things are workable, but far from ideal. This means that these issues will keep coming up again and again. I guess I can live with that, especially when I get back into my class! I was questioning whether I really wanted to teach anymore, even when they actual site lead gets back. I think I do. If nothing else, it distracts me from the almost hopelessness that seems to come over me otherwise.

 

Of course part of that feeling could be that I haven't been sleeping well. Last night I managed to get my 4 hours, or thereabouts, but previously I only got an hour and a half at best. This is causing my mind to reel with irrational thoughts and delusions and such. Not to the point of not being able to recognize them, but enough to cause problems with some of my interactions with coworkers and such. Some days I must wonder about all this ... what am I doing? Why am I doing it? Am I making a difference? What kind? Am I contributing to something I believe in? So many questions that really have no easy answer. Darn this lack of sleep!!!

 

All in all though, I am happy I am here; I am grateful for the opportunity I have been given to work with these students and the military personnel that I am working with. There is a lot I don't understand, and probably never will, but what I do is of benefit to me and some of the others that I have daily contact with.

 

 

Another Day in Paradice...

Yes, it is misspelled, but I did that on purpose! Sometimes you have to make mistakes in order for people to actually hear (or see) what you have said (or written). They say the squeaky wheel gets the grease; well it is quite similar to that. If everything is fine, well laid out, and has no noticeable mistakes, one pretty much dismisses what you have to say laying aside whatever it is you wrote and going about their busy life. If, however, you manage to throw in a few well places "mistakes", their eyes/ears pick up on this and try to process it. Sometimes they feel that any authority they may have placed in it to begin with is diminished, but they really only placed that authority in your writing because they now want to eliminate it, so the net benefit is actually positive. On the other hand, there are those who will process it and take those ideas and use them as their own. Sure this is not the best of all possible solutions, but at least the ideas are heard and perhaps something will get done. Or, the status quo will be maintained and nothing at all will get accomplished, which is the more likely outcome.



But, in this case, the misspelling is actually a commentary on my mental location at the moment. I feel like I am indeed living in a pair of dice. Things constantly change and are almost always given over to chance. It isn't even like these dice are loaded; they just roll along their merry way waiting for something to stop them. Hopefully they will come up 7 more often than not.


I have heard that my new teacher will be coming in soon... possibly today!! I am sooo excited!! I really want to have someone here to help out with the teaching and to bounce ideas off from. He has tons of experience and will be a great addition for both the students and myself. Of course this will also make it easier when the teacher who is on R&R returns as well. We will be able to move the new CI, whom nobody likes, to a non-intensive program or to be used in a standby capacity. Oh the improvements that are on the horizon.

I was also given word that I will be receiving a shipment of books sometime in the near future. Of course not near enough to be of the most use, but that is alright. They are being shipped in the name of the instructor on R&R, so I won't be notified when they get here, but that is alright... I can wait! I don't know where I am going to put 20 boxes of books, but we will find a place; the students will have their books, darn it!

Now, on to the work that is never done or else nonexistent. One cannot assume that just because it doesn't exist that it doesn't still need to be finnished. And the wheels continue to turn!

What was I thinking?

The past few days have been a treasure trove of experience and frustration! While we managed to hire a new teacher before the actual site lead went on R&R, none of the real problems came about until afterward. First, we managed to get more students. This was expected, of course, so it wasn't really a big deal... really! The problem was that the students who came and those we had on our list were not necessarily one in the same. I had to go through all the people that were in the files that we had in a different system to see if we could find them and figure out where we were supposed to put them. I initilally placed them based on what they told me their scores were as well as how well I believed their oral proficiency to be. Of course, with this course oral proficiency is the least of what matters!

 

After getting them split into classes, everyone starts complaining. With the site lead leaving, I had to take over his class which had grown to 18 (a MAX of 15 is allowed in a class). My old class started to complain about getting an Afghan teacher whom they thought was not going to do them any good. My new class found it necessary to complain that I don't teach like the site lead, so therefore I am doing it all wrong. In addition to that, the new students have already been aviators or have an English ability that would enable them to go on to training, so they resent being there and cause problems for me. One likes to show off and find obsure words, use them, and tell me that I don't know anything because I don't know the word. I have taken to ignoring him for the most part, but it is really frustrating.

 

After almost working through these problems, my old students took their book quiz. They didn't do too badly, but it marked the time for them to move on to the next book. Unfortunately we do not have the book they are going into, so I gave them the following it. This caused many expected problems as well as one unexpected one. I had just enough books for the students, so I felt fortunate. Then I found out that whoever had taken inventory of the books prior to me had placed about 4 or 5 in the wrong place: they were Teacher Texts instead of Student Texts! Now the students need to share a book until the new ones get here. I am not sure when that is going to happen, but it really should be soon as I ordered them about a week ago.. I just hope the same doesn't happen to my class as well as I will be giving a book quiz tomorrow.

 

Today is Wednesday and both my Contract Instructors (the Afghans) are going home to their city. This means that this afternoon and tomorrow, I will be the only instructor for the 3 classes. I am thinking I may cancel classes for the others, give the book quiz, and then let them go as well. This is hopefully not going to be a problem in the future as we are in the process of getting one more American here as well as the site lead will eventually return. Hopefully we will have enough staff then to man all the classes we need. Hopefully we will also recieve the books that we are supposed to have so that we can properly move from one level to the next. I also don't feel bad saying: I WANT my old class back!!!!

 

I am so glad that my day off is coming... hopefully it gets here quickly. I have not been eating lunch and dinner, nor have I been sleeping well. I guess this is probably not the best of things for this environment, but there you have it! I am staying safe, so now if only I would make sure to keep myself healthy as well.